The hardest part of holding on is to let go..

Ever had one of those days when nothing goes right? Bet you have. I was having one such day some days back. My mom scolded me early in the morning, I fought with a friend and I had lost my Xth standard mark sheet which I needed to attach to my college admission form. I was shuffling through my shelf and my drawers frantically when a sheet of paper fell down. I looked at it and smiled. I sat down and went through it. I recalled that particular day and a deep nostalgia shrouded me. That familiar school type of feeling swept over me. XIIth standard, a hot and humid day in July, it had only been a few days since school had reopened. Our classroom was bustling with noise and energy. One group was dancing, another bunch was having their tiffins like unfed junglies., some of them were singing and just going mad and the rest was talking and laughing. NO one was in mood to study. And it was a free period anyway. Our English teacher, Ma’am Ghosh, entered our class and as soon as she did, we started groaning and said ..”Ma’am pleeeeease, we don’t wanna study today!!” she covered her ears and tried to calm us down. We were practically out of control that day! Then she said that she had something in mind and led us out into the corridor. We all got out and were asked to sit in a circle. We were 60 students, and the circle formed was huge. She then asked us to take out a piece of paper and make two columns and write our names on the top. Then we were to pass it on to the girl sitting on our right. In the first column, we had to write one positive quality and in the second column a negative quality of the person to whom the paper belonged. And after writing, we were to pass it on till everyone gets their own paper back which would be filled with everyone’s thoughts and views about us. It was so much fun! Though some of them did not take it seriously and wrote funny trash, I genuinely wrote what I felt about everyone. I was very excited to read my paper and as soon as I received it, I sat in a corner and read my negative qualities first. Most of them had written that I was very kiddish and immature. It wasn’t that bad really. Then I moved on to the positive qualities. Seriously, it was such a pleasant feeling to read what they had written. They wrote that I’m a good person, very friendly, very sweet and so on. Some of really touched my heart with what they wrote.
I really felt that it was a very good idea. Everyone got a clear picture of what their classmates thought about them. I actually worked upon my kiddish behavior and have turned a little sophisticated. Ahem ahem! I have treasured the paper safely and whenever I read it, I get such a warm feeling in my belly. People actually like me.. for who I am and what I am. It’s really necessary in the world today to interact with all types of people. Even if you don’t really like them, it doesn’t hurt to be polite and sweet to them. Sometimes those people come to your help and the others don’t. I always try to look at the good side of people.
I still remember this particular time last year. It was July and it used to rain almost everyday and we used to rush out of our class and get wet and jump and play splish-splash in the puddles. What fun! We used to sing songs and dance like freaks! The going crazy, shouting like lunatics, laughing on senseless things, hogging on each others lunchboxes like dogs.. where did those days go, where? I miss school so much. Its funny, how much I used to abhor going to school in the junior classes. In the 12th standard I went to school almost everyday. I knew it was our last year and I was just trying to cling on those last few days, holding on to those premises, the field, and the classrooms. Can’t believe I’ll be starting with college now. I’m nervous and excited at the same time. I have a completely new life ahead of me. I hope people there too love me for who I am and what I am. I have my exams to give first. Have my fingers crossed!!