Thursday, April 19, 2012

The lunatic is in my head.

Whenever someone asks me “What’s your favourite food?” and I go “Pizzzaaa!” with a stupid grin on my face, they stare back at me blankly. “Pizza? Really?” with a raised eyebrow. So what, I’m too ordinary for you? Well, I’m terribly sorry. Maybe you already have a ready answer in your head. You’ve already decided that this particular French dish would be your go-to response when being asked about your favourite food, but for me pizzas work just fine. (Also, vegetarians do not have a wide variety of choice :/)

The sight, the aroma of cheese-filled gooey crunchy-on-the sides pizzas make me go weak in the knees. Serious! I can have it anytime and anywhere. Such a beautiful creation by mankind! :’)
Anyhoo, guess what? Tomorrow is my last day of college! As in, the proper, classes-filled day! I still have to give exams for another month. Kill me? :\

And how do I feel? Hmmm, how do I feel? I’m REALLY trying to figure it out since yesterday. And till now, I feel nothing. Nada! Is that normal? :O I mean, my first two years were pretty sick. I had a lot of senior-friends and everyone seemed to be so good back then. We went out, laughed, had crazy times, you know, the usual. But at some point, even getting out of bed to go to college used to be the hardest challenge. There have been days when I have wept. By fifth semester, I just wanted to run away. Sigh, I guess I’ve had my ups and downs. I guess you’re so excited about college that the ‘reality’ doesn’t really settle in until much later. What I can’t believe is.. THREE years have passed since I moved out of school?! Three?! Whaaa? How did that happen?!

I guess I should just appreciate these last days of exam-giving at home. Because very soon, I won’t get to sleep in the comfort of home, and have the luxury of being woken up by mom (and mostly not getting up), and get fresh, clean, nice-smelling, ironed clothes to wear, and creep out of my room scavenging for food like a nocturnal rodent at ungodly hours (and mostly always making cheese Maggi) and then watching a funny sitcom into the wee hours of the night, and then witnessing the beautiful morning light permeating through my curtains and mull over deep, philosophical thoughts about humanity, relationships, the universe and the meaning of life.

What will NOT change, is, I’m assuming, my entire trying-to-sleep process every night. Where I toss and turn, and then change positions, and turn the pillow, and hop to the other side of the bed, then go to the loo, have water, look at myself in the mirror, make faces, smile alluringly, do a few dance moves, get back into bed, check mail, check phone, try to sleep again, change into a more comfortable pair of shorts, turn the pillow over again, take the sheet, remove the sheet, take the sheet again and stick one leg out.. mull over and over and over over silly things and get worried about unforeseen future mishaps and think about past incidents, and then mull over the fact that it’s late and there is so much work to do and I will not get proper sleep and will end up going to college looking like a wet chicken. Then finally, somehow, anyhow, by god’s divine intervention, my eyes will close and I’ll fall into a slumber so intoxicating, so sweet, so delicious, so strong, that the entire world and the universe with all its billions of stars and galaxies will cease to exist for me, and I will wake up, late, ALWAYS late, cussing and cursing myself and stubbing my pinky toe against the foot of the bed.

That, I’m pretty sure, is a lifelong thing now. My mom told me as a baby I used to chuckle and chortle and kick my legs all night, and wail and sleep during the day. And to DATE, it has not changed. That’s how I am. I’m meant to rest throughout the day, and then PARRTAYYY at night! :P

A new semi-friend told me that I am a “bunch of nerves” and that I remind him of Rapunzel from Tangled. When I asked him why, he said that because EVERY time I meet him online, I’m in a completely different mood. He said I might be a schizophrenic. I don’t know, if I’d have a mental condition, I’d rather go for borderline maniacally depressed and bipolar with suicidal tendencies. The world will be so much more dramatic then :D I even told him that I imagine myself in extremely dramatic situations, and sometimes sitting by myself on a cliff, overlooking green valleys and rivers, with the breeze blowing my hair around my face. Of course, looking at the rate with which my hair is falling, I might be bald, for all you know, but I hope the rivers and hills will salvage the effect I want to create.

Okay, I’m nuts. I warned you! I am capable of giving myself headaches. I don’t know if this is the Tina Fey effect, (Thank you Karishma! I loved the book!) but I’ve been feeling pretty funny lately. I’ve been having funny monologues with myself, and chuckling to myself. Is THAT normal? :O

I asked Chee to write ten positives and negatives about me and this is what he wrote. He couldn't be more right. His assessment is spot on. Some of it here:

Brilliant conversationalist. Makes friends so easily. Such an excitable person. Bubbly and squeaky and spreads warmth and happiness.
Overly sensitive. Gets major upset over little things.
Able to express feelings perfectly, to the point and honestly.
Extremely lazy – to the point of bunking college and exams.
Extremely honest and trusting and deserving of trust
Big procrastinator
You make people feel special and comfortable and at home. 
Extreme mood swings. Unstable. Mercurial.
You don’t like to do things half-heartedly. You want to give your best attempt to all your responsibilities.
Sometimes acts without thinking

See? He's awesome! :D

Okay I have a Major project submission due in a matter of hours and I should either get back at it, or try to sleep. The topic is pretty interesting. "Neuromarketing: A Paradigm Shift in Advertising"; but I only wish I had worked more on it. I could have done a lot of things with it.
Sigh, long day ahead. Bah, I'm sure I'll survive! :) Or not. Okay no, I will!
Cheers ma' hommies!


  1. I looove pizzas. Awesome comfort food!
    All the best for your exams :)

  2. Pizza is my favourite food too :D

    I think how you're feeling about the whole leaving college thing is totally normal, a lot of my friends and I went through the same thing.

    LOL I liked reading your little rant there :P

    Ohh good luck with the assignment!
    And your exams!

    1. Wow, I'm suddenly realizing how so many people are crazy about pizzas! Makes me so happy! :D
      Thank you! :)

  3. so what is wrong with loving pizza? And the oozing cheese over nice veggies, served piping hot, that it makes your tongue scald for being too greedy.

    no sincere love than the love for food.
    And I hate college too, but mine is mostly because I'm in a crappy university.
    I think our entire generation is nocturnal.
    All the best for exams,Astha :)

    1. You're right. It's amazing how many of my friends ping me at 3, 4 5 AM! It's like our entire generation's lifestyle has gone berserk!
      I don't hate college, I'm just not attached to it.
      And thank you! :D

  4. I think the best invention the pizza people ever made was that Domino's cheese-burst pizza man! I sometimes wonder if that one was invented by people in food-heaven or cholesterol-hell. But but but Pizza! Duuuuude! Pizza DESERVES to be everyone's favourite food not a wishy-washy French dish. I think the only reason people eat/drink anything French is to sound uber-sophisticated while secretly hankering for a cheese drizzled saucy pizza with loads of jalapeno peppers.

    I should not be typing such things in the middle of the night. It's giving me a craving I shall have to wait until tomorrow afternoon to satisfy.

    And I am so glad you loved the book man! Tina Few is AWESOME! Okay, I have to start going overboard with the Caps :D

    And I have major awesome news man! Which shall be conveyed to you shortly. :)

    1. Would you believe I went out yesterday JUST to have cheese burst pizza? And considering how ravenous I was, I ordered a medium farmhhouse cheese burst ONLY for myself! I was full after two slices :\
      But I've got the leftover pizza! No hunting required tonight! Yee! :D

      And man, Tina Fey is genuinely witty man. Every line!
      (I LOVE the way you express yourself Karishma!)

      And WHAT awesome news?! I HAVE to know. I get too curious! :P
      Tell meeee!

    2. I just read my comment back and God, being sleepy does not suit me at all! :D I called Tina Fey, Tina Few for some reason. Now that's a Freudian slip she'd appreciate. :D

      Oh man I wish I was like her! She is sooo brilliant. :) And I messaged you on facebook. :) :) :)

  5. And and and my mum tells me I used to sleep all day and then wake up half the neighbourhood bawling at night! :D So yeah, I don't do that any more. Apparently I'm cured! LOL. :D

    1. Congrats!
      I still bawl! Whenever I feel like! :D

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  7. so now i know what to do to be kind to you (if you remember our chat yesterday :D) you pizzas!

    one more thing i guess wont change is your obsession with the weather, rain, etc. lol


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